A Blogger's Thanksgiving

I arrived at Tarragon Park a tad early, and sat in my car listening to NPR so as to avoid seeming over-eager. I brushed my hair, and checked that my ipad was charged.

The door was answered by @Wordbones, gracious co-host of our event. "Come on in. We're just choosing the wines for the meal." Pondering the perfect choices with him were the wine enthusiasts of @vinotrip. I knew right away that the selections for our gathering were sure to be first-rate. I heard some banging from out back.

"Don't worry about that," WB explained. "That's just @53Beers getting his tailgate operation on. He's determined to deep-fry a turkey out there."

Delicious aromas wafted through the house. I headed to the kitchen, where @hocohousehon and @howchow were discussing the finer points of roasting vs. sauteing the Brussels sprouts. Heavy cream and toasted pine nuts sat nearby. My offer of help was promptly refused.

@jessiex had arrived with her hoops, and plenty of them. I wondered if I'd even be able to fit inside one after the meal that was to come. The @wellandwise folks crowded around her, bubbling with enthusiasm for a post meal workout. @annathema and @tjmayotte arrived, fresh from a morning run. I was beginning to feel downright sedentary.

What a relief to spot @kikiverde in a quiet corner. We discussed upcoming holiday craft projects as the rest of the gang trickled in. @examorata sat nearby, scribbling thoughtfully in her journal. @ozoni11 slipped in and stationed himself at the computer, uploading photos he had taken on the grounds of Tarragon Park.

@sarahsays arrived with news of the new, free "Aquatibus", designed to move folks easily to the water facilities of their choosing.

"It never would have been possible with out all the valuable research that @ColumbiaCompass put together," she said. "Those statistics, charts, and his insightful analysis moved mountains!" Naturally, Mr. Compass was nowhere near to hear these accolades. Sarah said he was finishing the details of a deal to bring a microbrewery to the Wilde Lake Village Center.

"It's amazing the kind of work he gets done at the Columbia Mall Starbucks," I said.

Heads turned as a scuffling noise came from the entryway. "No press, no press!" someone was saying.
"This is a purely a social event!"

Of course it was @hocomojo,followed by various Patuxlets and Patchlets. "We'll be the judge of that," claimed @bitner as he slid past the gatekeepers. "Who better to appreciate the social nature of this event than your social media neighbors?"

@Annathema greeted them with a gentle smile. "You are very welcome," she said.

@LissaRossi set up on the couch for some live-blogging. She was joined by @dinosaurmom and @lifeslittlecomedies who offered support with snacks, drinks, wit, wisdom, and general hilarity.

@53Beers burst in with, well, fifty-three beers. A great ice breaker, and at just the right moment, I thought.

"But why 53 Beers?" I heard someone say.

"I was all out of gum," he replied cryptically, and retreated to his makeshift Purple Pit out back, muttering something about 'fishwrap'.

I worked my way over to the appetizers, where TJ and LisaB/Mrs S. were discussing the feasibility of running for the school board. @GCGeek offered suggestions as to the benefits of a witty Twitter presence for the would-be candidates.

@ColumbiaCompass arrived, beaming with satisfaction.

"Really, now. A microbrewery in Wilde Lake?" someone asked skeptically.

"Better than an inter-modal." he shot back easily, popping open a beer.

A call from our chefs brought us to the table. An amazing spread of local fare was laid out before us.

I noticed an empty seat.

"HoCoRising," explained Wordbones. "He's volunteering at Grassroots. He'll be along in a bit. "

Thus gathered, we bowed our heads for the blessing.


***

Happy Thanksgiving to the @hocoblogs community. Please accept this tale in the spirit in which it was intended -- a bit of fun during the dark days as the old year winds down.

P.S. For those who are wondering: of course we would be packing a hamper of the most delightful vegetarian fare for @hayduke and family.


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Well and Wiser?

Just in time for Thanksgiving I have a brand new reason to be thankful:  those chest pains and shortness of breath I felt on Sunday were not symptoms of a cardiac event. I'm not sure I really wanted this particular scare in order to feel thankful, in fact I know I didn't.  But I'm going to take it as a gift:  a chance to be alive and be healthier.

I insisted that my husband take me to the ER because I knew that I was a bundle of risk factors:  middle aged, overweight, high blood pressure, high cholesterol. I knew that  a woman's heart attack doesn't always present with the same symptoms as a man's.  So, even though I wanted to stay home and not trouble anyone, I went. 


I am thankful to my whole family for supporting me and taking care of each other.  I am thankful, goodness knows, for free wifi at Howard County General Hospital. I am thankful to my friends on Facebook and Twitter who kept me company with online messages of good cheer. I am especially thankful that it was probably GERD symptoms that put the fear of God into me, and not heart disease.

But I am happiest to use this space today to thank everyone who helped me at the hospital:  ER staff,
Triage and Admitting staff, Nurses, Techs, Transport employees, Lab technicians, Food Service workers,
Housekeeping, Janitorial Services, Technicians in Radiology and Nuclear Medicine,  Dr. Levy in the ER,
Dr. Silverman who monitored my Stress Test...


That's a long list, isn't it?  All of those folks, and probably more, were working to make sure I got the best care possible.  They were kind and respectful to me and my family.  They answered my questions. They smiled at my teddy bear. 


Today, encouraged by my family, I am taking a tour at a local fitness facility. I'm going to find the best ways to increase my activity levels, and I am making changes in my diet. 

Last night my family gathered for a happier occasion, the birthday of my youngest daughter.  I realized, for the first time, what an active commitment I will have to make if I want to be around to see many, many more of those celebrations.

This isn't just Thanksgiving for me, it's a whole New Year.

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Next on the Agenda

There are evenings when the words "Resident Speakout" can produce a certain anxiety in the hearts of local board members.  If you have had this experience, I don't have to explain. If you haven't, I'll try to make myself clear.

Both CA Village and Board meetings have a time set aside for residents to sign in and speak about a topic that is important to them.  As you might imagine, most people are motivated to do this by something that concerns them.  They may be upset, offended, indignant, outraged, or just generally cranky. I'm pretty sure that it's rare for a resident to come down to a meeting to thank the board members for something they have done right. It may happen, but I don't think it is a regular occurence.


It has been my experience that volunteer board members are not sitting around waiting for people to come and sing their praises.  Our board's most pressing goal is often simply to get through all the items we need to consider during the time we have allotted to meet, and to do them justice.  And let's not forget all of the work our Village Manager has done beforehand to prepare for the meeting.  It is amazing the amount of groundwork she covers so that we can do the best job possible for our village.

Now, back to Resident Speakout.  Perhaps none of us is at our best when already unhappy about something.  But it seems to me that we are seeing more and more people in our culture who come to these opportunities to speak in a combative and suspicious state. Whether at the Village level, Columbia-wide, or throughout the county, citizens jump from concern to conspiracy theories, from irritation to "it's us vs. them!"
This type of mind-set produces very little progress for the resident and extreme stress for the board members.

I have found myself deeply concerned about local matters this week. I want to write about them, but I'm not quite ready yet. Despite feeling low, I still had a glimmer of hope:  this week's Resident Speakout. 

Yes, really.

A group of residents came to speak about a matter that is extremely important to them. They spoke eloquently, and with great respect.  They were accompanied by an elected official who had clearly done his homework and was ready to work with the Board.  Meanwhile, the board was ready to discuss the issue because we had been kept abreast of the particulars by the Village Manager.  We had a wonderful discussion, even a few laughs. Progress was made and, I believe, everyone went away feeling valued and respected.

For those of you feeling as disillusioned as I have been, take this:  sometimes, it works.


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Ask Me

I got an email recently from a friend I have known twenty-five years.  We met through church and music connections, and have spent most of the intervening years as members of a congenial group I call The Birthday Club.  We all get together and have dinner when one of us has a birthday, bring funny birthday cards, and catch up on the goings-on in each others lives.

This fellow did me a special honor by giving me away at my wedding in 1999, as my own father was no longer living. "Pay attention," he said to me rather sternly, as we were about to walk down the aisle. "You need to pay attention. You're going to want to remember this."

Those words came back to me as I read the following:

Some time, when you are in Baltimore again and have the time, I would love to have lunch with you. You made a couple of comments at dinner the other night about politics and I'd like to pursue that subject a little with you. I give you my absolute promise to not make it in any way confrontational; I just want to understand what people who I suspect differ from me about it all think. I've tried with Susan (not her real name) and that, as you know, doesn't work so well; you, I know are more, well "agreeable" for want of a better word and will give me your thoughts without being too absolutist. Let me know if you'd be willing; I repeat, I will be a gentleman in every possible way.

 

This came as a shock. In twenty-five years we have discussed hymns, anthems, English cathedrals, where to get great Chinese food and how to make the best gin and tonics. We have never discussed politics. The Birthday Club follows an unspoken policy to avoid topics that may cause significant discord.

 

I have become more fearful in recent years of discussing politics. Not too long ago my patriotism and my faith were challenged because I didn't agree with prevailing political views.  And certain radio and television personalities, along with 'commenters' to blogs and online newspapers, believe that the exercise of free speech permits a sort of verbal vivisection of "the other." 

 

That's not how I work.  So I generally keep quiet.  But I feel this is an offer I can't refuse: an olive branch extended by a dear friend who thinks differently than I do.

 

And above all, a complete gentleman in every possible way.

 

hocoblogs@@@

 

 

 

Walking the Walk

In  a time that seems quite long ago, I joined neighbors and friends in support of  filling the empty commercial space at Thunder Hill and 175 with a Walgreen's store. I had, for 12 years, kept all of my prescriptions at the Bolton Hill Pharmacy in Baltimore because Oakland Mills had no neighborhood drugstore.  I was happy to champion the cause of a much-needed business located "within walking distance of my home."

It's true that I even threw a party at my home when they broke ground, with many of the refreshments purchased at (the River Hill) Walgreen's, just for fun.  I normally get my groceries at the Food Lion, and that certainly hasn't changed. Friends of mine from nearby villages pointed out that it would be more convenient, and a savings of gas, to come to the Oakland Mills store when it opened.  And of course, I crowed, it would be"within walking distance of my home." 

Walgreen's opened on a Friday in mid-June.  It has been a wonderful addition to Oakland Mills.  I have moved all my family's prescriptions there.  And can you guess how many times I have walked there?

Creative people can have a thousand ideas, but fear and uncertainly can kill every one just as fast as it is born.  It had to be" warm enough, not too hot, not rainy, not too cold."  I had to have "new walking shoes, enough time, someone to watch my daughter, no appointments, no commitments."

It turns out that I needed only one thing, or actually, a lack of something: excuses.  This blog post from
Sarah Says about the value of the pathway system to Columbia's citizens reminded me of my Big Talk about the Walk to Walgreen's.  Combined with posts by Miranda, Denise, and Sandy about loved ones running the Marine Corps Marathon, not to mention TJ's updates as he actually ran it, I realized it was time to fulfill my promise.

On a crisp, clear morning on the 31st of October I laced up my shoes, zipped up my jacket, and put down my fear.


(Starting Time)
Home:  9:36
Sohap: 9:43
Walgreen's:  9:49
(Returning)
Walgreen's 10:04
Sohap:  10:10
Home:  10:16

In just 13 minutes I had put to rest the notion that I was too old or out-of-shape to do it. It wasn't the easiest thing I have ever done, nor the hardest. I made some observations about the route as I walked.  The most crucial: why is there no crosswalk at Sohap? In order to cross in the safest and most legal way, I would have to go away from my destination to the crosswalk at White Acre. 

So now I have a new goal--who do I talk to about that?

***Well, if you must know:  hand lotion, a bottle of water, a cheddar cheese snack stick, and the Christmas issue of Victoria Magazine.


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Words To Live By

I have been considering this week what makes me a loyal follower of some local blogs, while with others I remain a casual visitor.  We have quite the choice in Howard County: some are witty, some informative,some challenging, some acerbic, some downright depressing.  Some appear to be thinly disguised commercial ventures.

The blogs that draw me, again and again, are ones whose writers appear to be following this simple process:  learn more, think more.  And then, they write.

Perhaps this is the blogger's equivalent of "measure twice, cut once."  Willingness to learn more, and to really think about what is learned gives the blogger the ability to grow and change over time.  This doesn't guarantee that the blogger will necessarily always reach the correct conclusions, or that the blogger is then a "better person" than other bloggers, or even that I will agree with the resulting posts.  It means that Jane/John Q. Blogger acknowledges that she/he is not the Center of the Universe.

When the writer's goal is to be to be the Center of the Universe, then the blog commits to Being Right, all others be damned. And some readers want this.  They want a place where their point of view is mirrored, their opponents skewered and ridiculed. And that will work for them--until, by chance, their opinions change, and the blog no longer "fits" them.

One of my favorite family stories is about an event which occurred when I was too young to really remember.  My sisters were helping my parents take apart the old swing set, to prepare for the arrival of a new one.  Each piece had to be removed before the frame was taken down. And so my sister Barb climbed up on the glider and began to unscrew it. She wanted to do it herself, so she didn't listen to warnings from onlookers.

( I'll allow you to figure this out on your own.)

Though it is far too late for her to benefit from this point of view, I think my sister needed to learn more and think more. In this same way, a blogger who is determined to "take down" the opposition may lack the vision to see the big fall that awaits inflexibility and narrow mindedness.

And so I give a big thank-you those Hocobloggers who allow learning, thought, change, and varying points of view.   Your posts, the discussions which follow them, and our community are the better for your efforts.


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All Politics is Local

Yesterday was a big day for my daughter's school, Talbott Springs Elementary. Principal Nancy Thompson set the tone for a positive experience for her students. Howard County Executive Ken Ulman paid a visit to TSES, along with Howard County Health Officer Peter Beilenson, to support the "30 Day Soda Free" Pledge. Also there to show support was Superintendent Dr. Sidney Cousin of the Howard County Public Schools. . When reporters and cameras from local media outlets show up, it's an exciting occasion.

This post is NOTabout the initiative, local dignitaries, Talbott Springs, or media coverage. It is about one child:  my child. And about how my involvement in local affairs has affected her. When asked about the event, she said, "I wasn't sure I wanted to raise my hand (to take the pledge) but it was Ken Ulman, and WBAL was there..." (emphasis hers)

Yes, that's right. She was keenly aware of the presence of local politicos and the press. And that's more than likely my fault. It's amusing and sobering at the same time. Everything about local events that I need to know to stay informed is discussed at home. I have a child who knows the difference between a Village Board and the CA reps. She knows I've gone to County Council meetings and School Board meetings. She has more than a superficial undestanding of the local blogging scene.

Remember, this post is about a child. So it is important to remember yesterday's Big Event from child's point of view. The best part of the "30 Day Soda Free" Challenge?

"It ends right before my birthday party!"

Happy (soda-free) Friday, everybody!

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