Blaming the Victim

 

Why do women still insist on jogging alone?

That was a poor choice of time to be jogging in dark park with long winding trails. Tree and brush thick along those trails. If dark, never jog in any park anywhere. Wait till other people around and light still present.

Can you guess what local story these two men were responding to? 

Howard County Police are increasing patrols in Centennial Park after a woman reported she was struck by an unknown man on a jogging trail. The 24-year-old victim reported that on March 11 a male suspect grabbed her from behind and struck her around 6:30 a.m. She was able to flee to her vehicle with a minor injury and did not require medical treatment. She described the man as White or Hispanic, 5’7”-5’9” tall, with dark eyes, wearing a black cloth medical mask and a black plain baseball hat. People in the area should be alert for anything suspicious. Anyone with information should contact police at 410-313-STOP or HCPDcrimetips@howardcountymd.gov. - - Howard County Police Department 

Yes, victim blaming is alive and well in Howard County.”Why do women insist on jogging alone?” The question I’d like to see people asking: why do men insist on attacking women? I don’t see anyone asking that. Instead I see admonishments and dire warnings, and lists of rules that women must follow in order to be safe. 

Surely a woman can be safe if she:

• Chooses approved times of day to be out and about
• Chooses approved locations in which to travel
• Brings an extra person
• Brings a large dog
• Brings a gun

This is not a recipe for safety. This is a societally approved system of restrictions for being a woman. 

Step outside the line? You brought it on yourself.

Hey there, men. What are you going to do to prevent yourself from attacking a woman today? What measures will you take to make sure you’re not an attacker? Perhaps you should limit the times you are out and about or only choose to travel to places where you won’t come in contact with women alone. Even better - - maybe you need to bring along an extra person with a big dog and a gun to keep you from being an attacker. 

That might do it.

The men who feel so confident in passing judgement in these situations seem to have one thing in common: blame. Bad things are never their fault. The finger of accusation is always pointed at someone else:

• It’s her own fault
• It’s Those People
• It’s Illegals
• It’s the County Executive 

I wonder if this is a character trait that they share with attackers. Do they, too, go through life pointing the finger at others? Claiming that their own bad actions are someone else’s fault? 

She made me do it.

Nobody treats me right.

One thing I don’t see in all those comments: empathy. And that scares me almost as much as the current of blame, if not moreso.

Dear woman who was jogging at Centennial, I really feel for you. That must have been such a frightening experience. I hope you are surrounded by the kind of love and support that will help you feel more like yourself as you heal from this experience.

It’s not your fault.

Village Green/Town² Comments