The 99 Cent Store

 

I’m wandering a bit off the track this morning. I was having lunch with my daughter outside of several fast casual eating establishments at Columbia Crossing yesterday and I dragged her into one of my favorite conversational rabbit holes: what if?

In the past I’ve explored a variety of “what ifs” on this page, including: what if we had a restaurant called the Magical Soup Company, what if you could get any variety of food by the bucket (like fried chicken), and even, what if the Wilde Lake Village Center were turned into an historical Columbia theme park. I’m fond of imagining things. What can I say?

Yesterday’s topic: 99 cents. 

Let me explain the premise. The establishment of a ninety nine cent payment to download a song on iTunes or a game or other app created the precedent for buying a small piece of something at a low price. You weren’t getting the whole album or an entire gaming system. Instead you could buy one individual thing.

There continues to be a discussion online about whether newspapers should make it possible to pay for individual stories in this way. Don’t have a subscription but really want this article? For ninety-nine cents it’s yours! I haven’t come across any news organizations actually doing this, however. I would use it.

Our lunchtime conversation centered around what other services could work with this kind of model. I told my daughter it didn’t have to be realistic - - we were brainstorming. Here’s what we came up with:

• Newspaper/magazine articles
• Advice/therapy/problem solving: one one issue per payment
• Go into the mall to pick up that one thing you need.
• Render Fox News unplayable in any public space while you are there.
• Change any song you don’t like in a restaurant.
• Tell you where you parked your car when you come out of Target (or the RennFest!)
• Find an open parking space (and save it until you get there?)

Yes, I know that therapy is worth more than ninety-nine cents. But what if you just need permission to throw out that old box of high school journals? Or help deciding whether to go to Cousin Betsy’s wedding in Vegas? Think of Charles Schulz’ Lucy Van Pelt dispensing brief but positive advice. 

“That’ll be ninety-nine cents, please.”

I’m not wedded to ninety-nine cents, although I do like the sound of it. Still, Dollar Tree is pricing things at $1.25 these days. iTunes is selling current hits for $1.29. Downloadable game apps are now mostly free but come loaded with in-app purchases. I’m not wedded to the actual dollar amount. It’s the concept that intrigues me.

Now it’s your turn. Think of it as a Hump Day diversion. Start with our imaginary ninety-nine cents and think of what kind of item or service would fit this model. It can be silly or serious, just not mean spirited or violent. As always, if I get enough responses I’ll turn them into a whole new blog post.

When I was seven years old we lived in Columbus, Ohio. Some of the local television advertisements were painfully homespun when it came to production values.Most unforgettable: the man who hollered, “Nine cents! Only nine cents! For only nine cents you can get a full living room suit or a live, healthy pony!” 

I’m beginning to think that advert made a deeper impression on me than I realized. I bet living room ‘suits’ and live, healthy ponies are at least ninety nine cents by now.