Thursday, January 28, 2016

One Last Word

The parking lot was well cleared.

The sidewalks were beautifully shoveled.

The guards who handled the check-in were friendly.


I don't ever want to go there again.

Sitting in court and watching the proceedings is educational. It's kind of like what you see on tv but not at all. It is a liturgy unto itself. The lawyers and the judge know the words of all the prayers and sometimes it seems as though the lawyers speed through them just to get them said. There are requirements. The requirements must be fulfilled.

Sitting in court and watching if you know the people involved is an entirely different experience. In the grand scheme of things I have done very little of this and just that little bit has been too much for me to handle. I feel crushed. I have absolutely no idea how people who have to endure an entire case drag on, over years, can survive.

Yesterday one such unimaginably long and painful case came to an end. Morgan Arnold was sentenced for her part in the murder of Dennis Lane, which occurred in May of 2013. Imagine what is has been like to be in the shoes of Dennis' family and loved ones for three whole years. Whatever you are imagining isn't enough.

I did not know Dennis well enough to be his friend. To me he was a hero, a blogger-rockstar, a bit of a mentor as I worked on developing my own blog. Dennis was the center of our blogging universe. Everything else revolved around him. And then he was ripped away and nothing about that universe can ever be the same.

I have nothing better than words to offer to his family, close friends, and loved ones. Even though words are the best thing I have, today they feel weak. Just as the somber incantations in a courtroom proclaiming a decision of justice feel weak in the face of a grief that has shattered a beautiful and interconnected universe.

In the face of all that, I've got nothing. Nothing but the words of a song and a hope that life will get easier.

When the road gets dark

And you can no longer see

Just let my love throw a spark

And have a little faith in me



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