Wednesday, December 27, 2023

They Might Be Giants

I spent a long time this morning looking for an article I had glimpsed briefly as I scrolled through TwitterX. This is because I had remembered the title incorrectly. What I was looking for, and had been intrigued by:

“Small Town Saved by Giant Nutcrackers”

In fact, the title was nowhere near as exciting.

“A town fell on hard times. Hundreds of giant nutcrackers revived it” Cathy Free, Washington Post 

No, it’s not a local story. It’s about Steubenville, Ohio. 

Steubenville Nutcracker Village

Nov. 21st, 2023 - Jan. 6th, 2024

The world's largest collection of life-size nutcrackers will be on display in historic downtown Steubenville ​throughout the entire holiday season.  The exhibit is free and open to the public 24 hours a day.  Pets are welcome but must be crowd-friendly and kept on a leash at all times.


Image from Steubenville Nutcracker Village

Two thoughts on this. The first is that the phrase “Giant Nutcrackers” immediately put me in mind of vintage, low budget horror movies or tabloid newspapers. I’m thinking something more along the lines of 

  • Small Town Terrorized by Giant Nutcrackers
  • Innocent School Children Abducted by Giant Nutcrackers 

They only come to life after dark…

Not everything can be blown up in size and still feel harmless. That’s part of the power of those old horror flicks. Giant insects, giant plants, giant worms…you get the picture. 

Giant nutcrackers? Well, I guess they’re okay as long as they behave themselves.

My other thought is that something like this would be difficult to do in Columbia/HoCo. We have too many factions. If Howard Hughes suggested it, the anti HHC folks would oppose it. If CA promoted it, the anti-CA folks would object. If it came from the County Council it would be decried as a Democratic boondoggle and if County Executive Calvin Ball made a pitch, all those trolls on his Facebook page would have a field day. 

Oh, how polarized we are. Almost everything I can think of would make somebody mad. 

And yet. The one headline that just might make everybody smile:

“Giant Nutcrackers Build High School in Elkridge” 

I can just about imagine it. But what would we do when they decided to run for the school board?

What do you think? Have we become so fragmented that getting benign or even positive things is impossible?

Village Green/Town² Comments

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