Ready for Summer Fun?

I shared this on social media yesterday so some of you will have already seen it but I am not done marveling at its awfulness.

Summer Fun Is Almost Here!

I think I can be forgiven for mistaking this at first glance for one of those “Join CA for summer fun!” mailers. It uses the CA blue and green (though not exactly the same shades.) It depicts a happy family and entices us with offers of discounts.

Oh my goodness. This is not an offer from the pools and pathways people. It is an advert for Columbia Memorial Park. Don’t miss this great chance to get your burial space, mausoleum crypt, or cremation niche. Buy now to avoid the summer rush.

Friends, this is not summer fun.

This is an exercise in extremely bad taste. Is it a deliberate imitation of Columbia Association mailers? Of course I don’t know that for sure, but, if I were CA I’d be annoyed. Or gobsmacked. Or amused.

I am entertaining possible captions for the photo in the top right hand corner of the mailer. My daughter has suggested that the child is thinking, “One of you will betray me.” What kind of story is this photo meant to tell? Is this the summer fun you will be able to have once you get that pesky burial plot purchase out of the way? Maybe I’m missing something, but I don’t have cremation niches on my immediate to-do list.

Do they know something I don’t know? This is creepy.

We are used to seasonal advertising that encourages us to attend to our roof or gutters, redo our kitchen before family holidays, or put in a pool before the hottest days of the year. There are legitimate reasons for marketing certain products or services at specific times in the calendar year. This isn’t one of them.

It’s true that I took a second look at this mailer because of its similarity to CA adverts. Perhaps that’s what Columbia Memorial Park was betting on. But that second look yielded incredulity, not interest. Especially now, when so many families have been touched by the grief of losing loved ones to COVID, selling the accoutrements of death as though they are seasonal amusements is more than macabre.

I don’t know what your recipe for summer fun is but I recommend that you begin by tossing this mailer in the trash.

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